So, I was awake just before 6 this morning thinking about the Oprah show! ARGH! I am so stupid and also probably worrying and thinking about it for no reason since I am not cool enough to be on..LOL I cannot stand the not knowing. I am so bad about that with everything, traveling is particularly bad. I always fret and lose sleep about stuff...and how ridiculous is that when there is nothing I can do about it!!! Stop it me!!! Stop it! I need to not think about it at all. It will happen or it won't, I have no control over it so I need to stop obsessing! Today I have a consultation appointment with a plastic surgeon to talk to him about fixing natures lapse in judgment at making my (*) (*) fall to the floor. It is just not cute. But between nursing 6 children, not to mention the pregnancies with all 6, and the weight gained and lost, it is not a pretty site and my doctor now thinks they may be seriously contributing to my back pain. They are actually so depressing to look at but it is not just them....gaining weight and losing it is not good for your skin. I have excess skin etc... everywhere....it makes me sad to think that no matter how much I work out or how fit I make my body I will probably never be able to fix things completely (ie: inner thighs, tummy, upper arms) I wish I could afford to have it all done but I probably will never be able to. My insurance may pay for the previously mentioned issue though since it is contributing to back chronic pain which is why I am seeing this surgeon...How vain am I though?? I shouldn't care, I know...but I do. I feel bad about my vanity...I am torn about the whole thing. I have finally broken through my plateau!!!!! I am back to continuously losing again! I was at that plateau for months and it was really hard to deal with but I did and have surpassed it for the moment! Swimming seems to have helped a lot. I really like it, too bad my swimsuit is so huge it falls off in the pool! That is not pretty...swimming along and whooops, no bottoms! LOL It is a tankini that I got in May to go on the cruise and is soooo cute I am so sad that it is too big. I loved it! So I safety pin and double tie my halter to hold myself in...it works and I swim! Well, the twins are finally awake. 9:22am....wish I was them and not awake at 5:49! TTFN :D
Comments