Paige

Paige got a cute haircut and I took a picture of her on Tuesday. She and I are in a constant control battle and over the past few months things have been pretty difficult and have come to a head. Like her Mom, Popup and sister Celia, she has ADHD. She has been taking Straterra and I came to the realization recently that it just wasn't doing much for her. It works great for Celia but it doesn't seem to be making a difference for Paige. I took her to the Doctor Monday and he prescribed Vivance(spelling???) Anyway, he said it was a wonder drug and said it is just great. So Tuesday I gave it to her in the morning as I was told. I felt like a horrible Mom as she dealt with stomach pain, weepiness and lethargy all day. The worst part was, her spirit had evaporated, leaving behind a shell of my sweet Paige. I missed her smile. She always has one for everyone. It made me sad. Behavioral problems need to be treated but is it worth losing her spirit? So the next morning(Wednesday) she threw up twice first thing in the morning. I worried and fretted about this whole thing. I called the doc and they said to still give it to her, so I did, with a LOT of reluctance. As the day progressed Wednesday she wasn't feeling ill and the lethargy seemed lessened. She got one headache midday that we were able to treat with some tylenol but I still missed her smile. She was so well behaved I felt like I had a different kid. She organized and cleaned things without being asked, she stayed with me at three different stores, she helped when I asked. She was wonderful...but I was still wondering whether it was worth not seeing her smile that lights up her whole face. Thursday was much better. I have seen her smile return a little bit and a bit of her pep peeking through, so I am hoping that as time goes on we will get more and more of her spirit back and keep the great behavior with the Paige everyone knows and loves. This has been so hard for me. I feel like a bad Mom. I love her so much, but admit it has been really hard to like her for a while. We need something to change positively for both of our sakes. We are giving this medicine a month and I hope and pray it works and we still get to keep Paige the way we always have had her.